just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
