I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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