My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
