No, you can still breathe under the balls.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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