the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
