we're blogging at a bar
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
