had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
