i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
