you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
