Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
