Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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