Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize