Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
