well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
