i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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