I wanna bring you to show and tell
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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