i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
