She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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