i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
