Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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