I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
