so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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