In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
