There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
