Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
