OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
