i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
