are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
