So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
