I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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