called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You are a genius and a whore.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
