Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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