I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
