yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
