nut hugger
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
well you can't waste a boner
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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