How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
