I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
