ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
