i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
