Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
