i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
