when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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