i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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