do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Boobs are out for the taking
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
