Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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