Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
