id be glad to
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
