I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
