You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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