4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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